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How Do We Change People? |
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Suppose someone falls away, teaches false doctrine, or struggles to overcome sin. How do we accomplish positive spiritual change in people? The question does not apply to matters of opinion or personal choice because we are to respect the individual consciences of other Christians; we should not merely convince people that our viewpoint is correct (Romans 14:1). However, we have a responsibility to one another as members of the same body (Romans 12:4-5; 1 Corinthians 12:20-26) including a responsibility to restore the erring (Galatians 6:1; James 5:19-20). Unscriptural Methods Coercion. Some use subtle intimidation and manipulation to change people or even resort to physical force. Complaining. Some use nagging and nibbing to change people or even griping until outward change and conformity occur. Conspiracy. Some use gossip and talebearing to change people or even ganging up on someone until they finally concede. Someone said that a man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still. Unscriptural methods may result in a change of conduct simply to please the critics, but a genuine change of heart has not transpired, besides that such methods are carnal and do not meet the approval of God (1 Corinthians 3:1-4; 2 Corinthians 10:3-6). Do we want superficial change motivated by the pressure to conform or positive spiritual change motivated by the desire to serve God? If we are concerned about the souls of men and women, we must examine our attitudes and reactions to the problems because unscriptural methods may be crippling our effectiveness. It shows a lack of faith in God and His word to resort to carnal methods. Scriptural Methods Teaching. Jesus emphasized the importance of teaching by quoting Jeremiah who prophesied that men and women under the new covenant would enter into a personal relationship with God through teaching and learning. “No one can come to Me unless the Father who sent Me draws him; and I will raise him in the last day. It is written in the prophets, ‘And they shall all be taught by God.’ Therefore everyone who has heard and learned from the Father comes to Me” (John 6:44-45). Furthermore, once we establish a personal relationship with God, it is maintained in the same manner. “Therefore, laying aside all malice, all deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and all evil speaking, as newborn babes, desire the pure milk of the word, that you may grow thereby, if indeed you have tasted that the Lord is gracious” (1 Peter 2:1-3). We must use the word of God to appeal to the hearts of men and women because of its power and pinpoint precision in opening our eyes to the secrets of the human heart. “For the word of God is living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart” (Hebrews 4:12). The life-changing power of the word of God can potentially produce positive spiritual change! Influence. We should not underestimate the importance of a positive example in inspiring people to change. “Do all things without complaining and disputing, that you may become blameless and harmless, children of God without fault in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world, holding fast the word of life, so that I may rejoice in the day of Christ that I have not run in vain or labored in vain” (Philippians 2:14-16). The ultimate goal of influencing people is turning hearts toward God, not ourselves. “Beloved, I beg you as sojourners and pilgrims, abstain from fleshly lusts which war against the soul, having your conduct honorable among the Gentiles, that when they speak against you as evildoers, they may, by your good works which they observe, glorify God in the day of visitation” (1 Peter 2:11-12). The result is that God is glorified! Discipline. It may be necessary to exercise church discipline when an individual stubbornly refuses to change, but church discipline is more than threatening someone with a letter that we may withdraw from them. It involves making someone aware that we do not endorse the sin in which they continue to persist when all other options have been exhausted. It should be a spiritual process from start to finish. The Bible addresses church discipline in Romans 16:17, 1 Corinthians 5:4-5, 2 Thessalonians 3:6, and Titus 3:10. How and when church discipline should be exercised is a matter of judgment because spiritual change does not occur on a timetable, but we must remember that the aim of church discipline is repentance, not merely to clean house. The Human Will The “x-factor” in accomplishing spiritual change is the human will because the heart must receive the word of God like a seed planted in the soil (Luke 8:4-8, 11-15). We may use scriptural methods including teaching, influence, and discipline and the corresponding change may not occur. The negative response is not because the scriptural methods lack power, but because the individual chooses not to be transformed. The reality that one may choose to accept or reject the word of God is no excuse to be lazy in our work to restore them. We cannot control how people respond, but we can control our attitudes and methods because there is a right and a wrong way to change people—and it matters!
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